24 December 2013

Thoughts on Marriages

This is a bit rambly and not cohesive. Sorry. It's just my thoughts today.

I'm in Utah for the Christmas Season, and what a season it is! Christmas came early to Marriage Equality supporters this year. In a crazy turn of events, Utah became the 18th state (in a slow, but steady march of states) to legal same-sex marriages. I know! I thought my fiancé was playing a joke on me when he told me on Friday. But it's all true.

All these couples who are patiently awaiting their turn to receive their license and stand before a justice of the peace has really got me reflecting on marriage and marriage ceremonies.

These couples astound me with their humbleness. Their quiet gratitude and overwhelming happiness to *finally* be legally married to the person they love. It's just. Wow. Just wow.

Puts the ritual into perspective.

There is no gown. There is no cake. There are no bridesmaids or groomsmen. There is just them. Two people and a handful of loved ones on hand to witness the union.

Ben and I are planning our wedding, and we were talking about chairs for the ceremony. I suggested the metal chairs from the church, he suggested renting. Both of us have our reasons for our "sides," all of which are valid.

Today after seeing more pictures of women and men in day wear (not gowns or tuxes), glowing with their happiness, put all of our planning into perspective.

Chairs don't matter, people.

Cakes don't matter.

Nothing matters but that one moment when you commit to the other person.

I always knew that and have been trying to keep our wedding on the simple side, and Ben fully supports that idea. Creating a beautiful day for you and your family is a nice thing, but it's not an important thing.

For the record, we decided no chairs. We want to be surrounded by those we love.

Our day will be beautiful. But from now on, whenever I feel that our day is becoming too much of a show and not about us, I will remember these wonderful couples and bring it back into perspective to us.

Another article.

And one more.